Jim the Vagrant

Inventor Arch Lord

Main Event Winner!

Hall Of Fame!

Survival - 14 Wins!

Brutal - 4 Fatalities

AFFILIATION

Alignment: Villain

Team: Freelance Villain

VITAL STATS

Strength: Standard

Agility: Weak

Mind: Weak

Body: Standard

RECORD

Personal Wins: 14

Personal Losses: 4

Sonz of Mojo inc.

This is the story of Hobo Jim. Jim lived a hard life, losing his job as a greeter/bouncer at the local S-Mart (Shop Smart, Shop S-Mart). He had held this position for 47 straight years. He was fired for allowing two kids in a Dark Blue Ford Ranger drove right through the front door, setting the entire store on fire while fighting a possessed shopping cart attendant. After that, Jim was screwed. His life in shambles, he began to wander the hard streets. He was Homeless, Jobless, Carless, and most of all, womanless. As he wandered, he held long, in depth conversations with Mittens, a stray cat he picked up under an ATM that was spitting money. Ignoring the money and taking the cat, he moved on. He found Mittens to be quite intelligent, far more than he, even though he was the only person that seemed to be hearing Mittens. The two wandered through the sewers of Khazan, emerging in the center of Uptown. The streets of Uptown were so much more accommodating than they were in Lowtown. Continuing to wander, he eventually made his way to the Khazan Arena. Finding the front door (Mittens had to show him)he saw the perfect opportunity to make some money.

Jim, Well, Jim's a moron. A grade-A 100%, unadulterated Dumb-Dumb. As for his personality, he's a smelly old guy that talks to a cat. Mittens is pretty cool, though...

Inventor

     Inventor: Standard

 

Jim has lived on the streets for so long, he has learned the art of Backyard Engineering. Also known as making things out of random CRAP! He can create completely useless tools out of other completely useless objects.

 

Aww, Sweet Kitty....Oh My God!

     Damage Shield: Ultimate

  • Area Affect
  • Double Damage to l1v:Empathy
  • Armor Piercing

 

You don't get close. No. Bad. Step away from the bum. It's not the fact that he reeks. It's not the shank. It's not even the fact that he's pretty big. It's the fact that he has a homocidal psycho kitty in his arms. And it kills. You come near, you die. Nobody has lived to tell the story, but it's rumored that kitty grows to ten feet tall and grows horns and razor teeth. Do you wanna find out? Come pet my kitty...sweet kitty...Yes, those with Empathy...you like kitties...you're nice...you care...Kitties are nice. Die a million times over, you tree hugging freaks!!! Kill, kitty, kill!!! KILL!!!!! I WANT BLOOD!!! GO FOR THE FACE!!!

 

Yes....pet the kitty...hehehe

     Emotion Control: Supreme

  • Auto-Hit Attack

 

Hmmm...It's such a cute cat...don't you wanna pet my cat? Who told you the rumors about a ten foot beast with razor teeth? He won't rip you to shreds. See? Sweet kitty...Come to the kitty...Love the kitty...AAUGHGHHGGHHH!!!! LOOK AT IT RIP YOU TO SHREDS!!!! I mean, pet the kitty, love the kitty...Yes, you can pet the kitty. Sweet Kitty...It won't bite. *whisper* It'll maul you to hell and back. Oh...you don't want to pet the kitty??? hah!! you cannot resist the kitty!!!! For the weilds the almighty weapon of cuteness....THE KNITTED KITTY SWEATER OF ULTIMATE CUTENESS!! NOW, COME PET THE KITTY!!!

 

What's wrong, Mittens?

     Environmental Awareness: Standard

 

"What's that mittens? You say someone's coming? OW!!! Get your claws outta my arm!" On the streets, Jim met a lot of people. Even with a third grade education, he never forgot a face, a voice, or even a smell. Whenever he met somebody that he didn't like, he invited them to pet Mittens. The cat even sensed things. When the cat sensed things, she dug her claws into Jim's arm, alterting him.

 

He talks to the cat...

     Closed Mind: Supreme

 

The only thing he'll listen to is the cat. To break this jumble of confusion, you gotta be a badass mentalist. Upon entering the mind of Jim, You find....nothing. What's behind door number 1? Nothing. Door number 2? Hey!!! It's a sweet kitty...should I pet the kitty? Nahhh...Door number 3? There's gotta be something around here somewhere...he can't be focused on the cat and only the cat...

 

Not a microwave, that's sure

     Portable Nuclear Accelerator: Supreme

  • Ranged Attack Only
  • Area Affect
  • Armor Piercing
  • Target Seeker
  • Multi-Attacks
  • Ranged and Melee Attack

 

One day while trying to make a microwave out of scavenged parts he found in a dumpster, he messed up. Bad. Or was it good? Bad, 'cause he didn't make a microwave. Good, becuase he somehow managed to create a portable nuclear weapon. The "microwave" was able to fire nuclear energy in a direct blast, which explodes on contact. The high levels of radiation burn right through defenses like butter. After a while, Jim began to try to fix the microwave, only to make it even more powerful, and now it fires of multiple burst that somehow manage to track down whoever he is up against. Finally realizing that this could be used as a weapon instead of a tool for cooking the half eaten burritos he finds in dumpsters, Jim now weilds his deadly Microwave.

 

SUPERLEASHEDDEATHKITTYATTACK!!

     Elongation: Standard

  • Ranged Attack Only
  • Weakness: Limited Uses - Multi-Use

 

Image if you will, a man, a wanderer, a vagrant even, carrying with him a small and adorable kitten, so adorable that you feel insanely compelled to go pet this kitty, cause its so pretty, and cute and loveable. Now, imagine that you are burdened by some work, or job that you must do, and that your will holds you back from going to pet this cute kitty. But what is this? it would seem the kitty has a leash, and is going to come to you, aww, how cute look at it go, look at that, it came right to you, what a nice kitty. DEAR GOD IT'S RIPPING OUT YOUR VITAL ORGANS AND EATING THEM WHILE YOUR STILL ALIVE!!! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE THE HURTING STOP!!! DEAR GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! THE BLOOD! THE CHAOS! THIS KITTY IS A DEMON FROM THE PITS OF HELL!!! THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU! BEGONE FOUL CREATURE! OH! HOORAH! SOMEHOW, YOU MANAGED TO KNOCK THE LEASH FROM THE HOBO'S HAND! NOW THE KITTY IS ON THE LOOSE, TEARING THROUGH THE CITY CAUSING EVEN MORE DESTRUCTION! But you are safe, at least until the owner calls the kitty back to his side, luckily he doesn't have his leash anymore, but I still wouldn't go near the old bum.

 

Shiv of the skreets

     Thrusting Attack: Superior

  • Ranged and Melee Attack
  • Weakness: Power in Item - Hard to Lose

 

Living on the streets as long as Jim has he's learned the streetlike art of Prison Shanking. Carrying his mighty shiv with him wherever he and Mittens go, Jim is hardly afraid to go hilt-deep into a random hooligan attempting to use his cardboard home as a make-believe racecar, or an arena combatant come to test his mettle against the old hobo and his SUPER LEASHED KITTY DEATH SLASH. Cold nights make it hard to hold onto the shiv, but the homeless old man's steel-like grip holds tight to the handle, dropping it only in the most unfortunate of situations...but it's ok. Mittens is still there for him. Sweet kitty...