Babylon Jones

Hall Of Fame!

Survival - 10 Wins!

AFFILIATION

Alignment: Villain

Team: Freelance Villain

VITAL STATS

Strength: Standard

Agility: Standard

Mind: Standard

Body: Superior

RECORD

Personal Wins: 10

Personal Losses: 3

Poe

Okay now picture Charles Dickens's classic "Oliver Twist"...only with undead, topless, manga, ninja assassins. And then imagine- Err... on second thought that was a pretty crappy analogy. Never mind. Start over. When former top level Yakuza 'Person That Makes Things Stop Breathing' (that's the Mafia's new non-gender specific P.C. term for 'hit man') Babylon Jones was doubled crossed and left for dead, (Public Service Announcement: you should never, ever do this in real life... yeah, always check to make sure the person is 100% dead before you leave 'em, cause something like this might happen and then they'll come back all pissed off and wanting vengeance and stuff.) she just wasn't allowed to die. A mysterious young Asian girl appeared before her and saved Jones' life by infecting her (In a very Anne Rice by the way of yuri hentai kinda scene, btw.) with whatever the girl had, leaving Babs completely immortal. Though She now felt a bit gypped- still being the poster girl for being royally @#$%^% up the @$$ by life; but now without even hope for the release of death (or even just getting good and plastered... damn enhanced healing abilities) and all- yet she has gained a newfound desirer to turn over a new, brighter leaf... Even though still treated as an evil, cold-hearted bitch by most of the world, Babylon has begun a quest... perhaps one doomed for failure, but a quest nonetheless...(Cue the "Man Of La Mancha" music) ...to do good while still being violent. ...To shoot when her gun's out of ammo. ...To kick a guy in the crotch, though her leg has been severed. ...To dream the im-poss-i-ble dre- err... I mean- the HEROIC DREAM! *Whew* (Yes, kids... trying to write a spoiler-free bio is a pain in the ass-_-)

"Ugh... her?! She was...kinda strange sometimes. Jones seemed to be in a constant state of flux, a little cry baby wanting attention one second, a badly cliched angst filled loner the next. Sometimes she would try to be a pacifist, while other times she would walk into a bar carrying her own weight in weapons and try to start a fight with everyone in the place. So many annoying contradictions... I don't know...I think something happen to her at some point to make her act like that. But she sure the hell never admitted anything about what it could be to me... maybe she's never admitted it to herself either. Heh, of course...I'm not the exactly the type that should be talking about emotional stability myself." –Jordan Kennedy, former sidkic- *BOOMM!!!* AHHH !! Er...associate.

Master Training

     Master Training: Standard

 

Babs' childhood was... unique to say the least. A father who was a IRA terrorist before immigrating to America, a mother who, thanks to years of practicing Kendo with her brothers back in Japan, was almost equal in skill to a 4th Dan master, a black market arms dealer for a grandmother, and let's not even go into the weird stuff her older sisters were into. So suffice to say... She picked up a lot unusual skills growing up.

 

Immortality (Pat. Pending)

     Regeneration: Ultimate

 

-Imagine there was a virus; something almost akin to a STD... only once a person was infected with it they were unable to die. A virus of unknown origin (yes, 'unknown' because I still need some sort of shocking plot twist I can use later) that was somehow advanced enough to comprehend that simply reproducing it's self to infinity wasn't the way to ensure it's survival... it's host must be preserved as well.- Nowadays, considering her present situation, Babs really does wonder how she manage to live as long, and stay all in one piece, as she did. And sometimes she really does think it's odd that all the gunshot wounds, all the cuts, the constantly losing body parts in creative, painfully violent ways... seemed to begin only after she became immortal. And she often she finds herself debating really what is the cause of it all... Is it because she has become lazy since she can't actually die anymore; or the more frightening possibility... is it because she's so stupid that she just keeps running off and doing obvious, spectacularly dangerous things?

 

Obaakiru Bakani Kenjutsu

     Sword Master: Supreme

 

The 'Overkill Taken to a Ridiculous Level' school of anime style Kenjitsu. She slices! She dices! She... umm... Damn, I wish I could remember what I wrote here the last time. Alight, let's try that again. Having the fortunate luck (some would use the word 'contrived'... but not me) to have the disowned daughter of the head of a famous kendo school for a mother and thus provide a handy semi-plausible explanation for this skill; Babs is an unrepentant show-off in the handling of all manner of sharp, pointy things.

 

Psycho John Woo/"Matrix" Shit

     Marksman: Superior

 

Because swords alone just wouldn't seem phallic enough. Y'see... Her dad was a bit odd in the head. He really did expect society to crumble at any minute, so he made sure that all his girls knew how to handle themselves just in case the world turned into one of those trite, lawless, apocalyptic, 'Road Warrior' type deals. This, of course, includes all sort of fun skills that have no practical use in any job field besides assassin, bounty hunter, or wandering hero and would take way too many damn points to list on this character sheet... so let's just concentrate on the gun part here.

 

Failed Wannabe Gymnast

     Acrobat: Standard

  • Weakness: Not usable in terrain - Low Gravity

 

Aww.. It's sound so pathetic that it's almost cute... but Babs really wanted to be an Olympic gymnast when she was a kid... yeah, it is sad isn't it? But that's what she wanted, and why not really? The fame... the honor... the attention... the jumping around in those tiny outfits that show off their tight lil butts... mm-mmm... um, excuse me a sec. *Disappears for a few minutes* Ahhh... now what power description are we on? Acrobat? Okay... now where was I... She would practice every free moment she had and actually became quite good but still just not good enough, and besides it was about that time she went through puberty and discovered boys. So Jones eventually gave it up and tossed that dream in the trash where so many of her other dreams soon winded up. *Sniff* Really, it is a shame... after all, with her family and background she would have made a great subject for those moronic, touching emotional filler segments that they always run in-between events to try and get people to actually give a damn about the athletes instead of just staring at their firm little butts... Err... excuse me again... *disappears again* Anyway, shit happens... but at least all that practice still comes in handy. Though something like a change in gravity would throw off her balance and.... Oh please, what a steaming load of hypocrisy... like I didn't take the weakness just for more points... just move on already.

 

JordanTech

     Weapons Creation: Supreme

  • Ranged Attack Only
  • Multi-Attacks
  • Ranged and Melee Attack

 

*Taken from original ad ran in JordanTech® Online Catalog (product# 241B)* "Wish you could take a sword with you wherever you go... even when you're only wearing a thong? Do you have trouble hiding that anti-tank rocket launcher in your eveningwear? Or do you just feel cheated that you can't access Hammer space™ like some big eyed schoolgirls with gaudy pastel colored hair can? Well, we at JordanTech®, "Weapons of Mass Destruction with a Feminine Touch"™, have a product for you! Based upon 7th generation teleportation technology, (the other guys still just keep upgrading their original model) The JordanTech® Brand Mobile Subspace Weapons Teleportation System is the bleeding edge in ordnance transportation solutions. No longer do you need room sized central units to transport your stuff to your location anymore, this advanced PORTABLE unit fits into a leg or wristband that's about the size of a garter belt. (it goes great with formal wear) And it's so simple to use! All you need to do is place these special homing beacons (Sold separately) on whatever you need in a hurry... swords, guns, tools, pocket tactical nuclear explosives, anything that could fit in your hand and then, with the press of a button, watch it instantly appear right into your hands. (Average Transport Time: 1.25 seconds, your time may vary.)"

 

Ninja Chic

     Blending: Standard

  • Weakness: Not usable in terrain - Steel Cage

 

Let's face it... ninjas are just the shit. Hiding in shadows, popping out of a dark corner to surprise an opponent, killing silently... So of course, Babs absolutely iodizes them and tries anything to be as smooth. Hell, she even had a crush on Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow (e Hasbro or some other evil, faceless, corporate machine) back when she was ten. For some reason ninjas seem to be the only people who can get away with sneaking around and attacking someone more powerful while their back is turned or asleep and not get called chicken for doing it. But no matter how badass... there are some places that just don't have anywhere to hide.