JAY: The gates all around are now opening and a host of unspeakable horror
rushes out at ASH and DUKE and I think they're saying something... no, I
was wrong they're just yawning with apparent boredom.
PAT: A hideous, towering, bloodstained abomination from Hell rushes Duke
Nukem! Duke blasts it! Slams shells... Blasts it again! SLAM- BLAST!,
SLAM! BLAST!
JAY: Several more come at them from all sides. Ash fires, he blows the head
clear off one those demons. He throws his weapon over his shoulder
pointing it behind and fires again striking another that was charging him
from behind.
PAT: Duke catches a glimmer about 10 yards off... An automatic Nail Gun
power-up has appeared! He makes a run for this new weapon...
JAY: Ash empties his gun and with no time to reload he's starting use it as
a club... He's bashing heads left and right but the monsters keep coming...
PAT: Duke sprints and slides... gaining the shiny new weapon!
JAY: Ash is still clubbing away at the unspeakable horrors left and
right...Ooopps, his rifle broke over one of the creatures heads.
PAT: Blood and cartilage spray in a beautiful technicolor dream as Duke goes
to town with the nail gun!
JAY: Ash is running about trying to stay one step of the evil horde... wait
he finds a weapon... it's a chain saw! In a half-crazed laughter he charges
at them...
PAT: Duke Nukem sprays nails from the nail gun into the body of some
incredible, blobulous, pus-filled horror! Oh, God... The stench!
JAY: Ash is just slicing them down with his chain saw and pieces of them are
just a FLYING...
the gore of it all!!
PAT: Still the monsters emerge streaming from the gates... spewing from the
Arena's lower catacombs like some sort of wretched bile from a sick
teenager!
JAY: Ooopps, Ash's chain saw seems to have caught itself inside one of the
demon beast that he was slicing through... he can't free it no matter how
hard he pulls and twists.
PAT: Tough break for Ash, folks! Now lets turn to our own Sideline
Commentator Frank Williams who has this special report...
Ah, what a bloodbath tonight! It is rare to see such carnage that is not caused by Callisto, eh? Anyway, this is Frank Williams and in this commentator's humble opinion, Duke has this one nailed. I mean, who the heck is Ash??
He's a nobody! Duke has
the skill and the natural wit of an action hero. And he is not totally
against the use of steroids! Duke will emerge victorious on this one, I predict! ...Back to you Pat!
PAT: O.K, Thanks Frank. What do you have now, Jay?
JAY: A new power-up weapon appears and Ash is eyeing it...
Mmmmm.... Mini-gun.
PAT: Speaking of power-ups... Duke is racing like mad from a three-headed
foaming dog beast! He's heading for a fresh box of ammo for his nail gun!
JAY: All hell is breaking loose now... Ash opens up
with the mini-gun! He's sparing nothing, not even the ammo. He's reducing
several creatures in bloody mangled heaps!
PAT: Duke gains the nail gun ammo... And not a moment too soon!! Freshly
powered up, Duke whirls and spits nails at Dog-Thing! Bloody chunks of
sick meat fly into the crowd!!!
JAY: Ash is doing the Rambo yell now, both of these guys are loving it! It
like waiting dueling meatgrinders in action.
PAT: Oof! You ain't kidding, Jay! And now let's go to our own Jack
Gibson... on the spot with this special report.
Thanks Pat! The stench is rampant down here and so is the carnage! I'm bathing in blood I tell you. The site of these two contestants going at
it is awestriking. They're both cutting down demons and monsters... and I'll tell you this is anyone's contest! Hey, watch it buddy!!! I don't think that pus will come out with dry cleaning!! I think I'm going to be sick... Back to you Pat!
PAT: Thanxs Jack. O.K... what do you have, now Jay?
JAY: Not surprisingly Ash has run out of ammo for his mini-gun is he's
running for his life. Wait... Another power-up weapon has appeared. Ash
makes a flying leap for it... Yes, it a flamethrower!
PAT: Duke sees a new weapon, too! Oooh... A Rocket Launcher!
JAY: Looks like we're gonna have us a little barbecue, Pat.
PAT: They've each retrieved the new weapons... The smell burnt monster flesh and sound of exploding grenades rocks the stadium!
JAY: Pat, there's so many slagged carcasses out there, these two guy's are climbing over 'em! I have no idea who has the points here.
PAT: And there's the time out whistle! This match is history! Let's see who killed the most monsters!
'Nuff Said!
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